Midwest Writers Guild of Evansville, IN

Last night I went to my first meeting of the Midwest Writers Guild of Evansville, IN.  They meet on the second Tuesday of each month at Barnes & Noble.  I got to meet actual published authors!  How exciting is that?  I got to tell a group of serious writers about myself, my book, and about my aspirations to become published.  How cool is that?  I also entered a 1000 word short story in their holiday themed fiction writing contest. 

It's time for me to get serious about seeking representation for my memoir.  This requires finding the right agents and sending each of them a query letter.  A query letter is basically a sales pitch and a request for them to read my manuscript.  They may request a nonfiction book proposal and/or sample chapters, as well.  Oh, I hope they do!  The tricky part, I think, is that each of these query letters needs to be specific to the agent.  I need to research the agent and the authors he/she represents and tell the agent why I think my book is a good match for him/her.  Agents do not want cookie cutter query letters.

Below is the first draft of my query letter (minus individualization for different agents).  I have done a lot of research on query letters, but I liked what Cec Murphy had to say about it the most.  Cec Murphy is a New York Times bestselling Christian writer.  He says to follow this format:  1st paragraph elevator pitch; 2nd paragraph bio; 3rd paragraph "May I send you my completed manuscript?" 



Dear Agent:

As a woman who spent four years battling infertility only to become pregnant with a child who would die in her arms just two hours after his birth and then suffer an unexpected and devastating miscarriage the same year, I know all too well the challenges and heartache that grieving mothers face. My proposed title, LETTERS I’LL NEVER SEND: MY JOURNEY TO OVERCOME INFERTILITY . . . AND THEN, EARLY INFANT LOSS, reveals the pain and eventual acceptance my husband and I experienced as we overcame both male and female factor infertility. I then tell the true story of being pregnant with a child that medical tests revealed could not live outside the womb due to a chromosome abnormality that was “incompatible with life.” The story is intertwined with letters to my infant son that offer a very intimate look at a mother’s grief and continuing love for her special baby both while he is in the womb and following his birth and death. Scriptures are added to emphasize my continued faith in God as I relied on Him to carry me through my most difficult times.

I am a writing teacher with a master’s degree in literacy, so I know how to write skillfully and with a strong voice. A 1900 word excerpt from my memoir titled Our Final Hours was awarded 21st place in the memoirs/personal essay category of the 79th Annual Writer’s Digest Writing Competition. In addition, I am the author of the increasingly popular blog Mrs. Skinny’s BBQ, Books, and Babies. I invite you to view it at http://bnjames.blogspot.com/ and to check me out on Facebook.

I think my 62,000 word memoir would make a great addition to the Christian Inspiration section of bookstores and possibly retail outlets. May I send you my proposal or my completed manuscript?

Thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely,
Bonnie James

 
What do you think?  Does this make you want to read more?  Did I hook you with the first sentence, or do you think I can do better?  Should I keep the part about my education in there?  I can't decide.  I am only considering it because it emphasizes that I am a serious writer, not just a first-timer or a one-hit-wonder.  I do want to add statistical information about the number of miscarriages and early infant deaths in the U.S. each year to show that I know the market for the book.  I need to do more research.
 
Agent Kristin says a memoir should be, "A world that is unbelievable but true. A world that is unique but resonates with us. A story that captures a universal feeling and the reader senses the connection.  That’s what makes the memoir powerful. And if a writer doesn’t understand the difference of what I’m trying to explain here, he/she will probably never have a memoir published.  And whether the writer understands this or not is usually very obvious and clear in the query letters we receive."  What do you think she would think after reading my query?